marriage bed symbol

marriage bed symbol

Thursday, August 19, 2010

Welcome to one and all!

My name is Sam Zaragoza, and I'm a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints, also known as the Mormon Church.

My wife and I were sealed in the Seattle Washington temple over 17 years ago. Over that period of time, it's inevitable that the strength of a relationship will be tested in many ways, and we have been and continue to be tested even today.

Fortunately, my wife and I have maintained a strong relationship with each other. All through that time, as we watched others struggle with marital intimacy issues as we did, and even watched some of them lose the struggle, I always wondered, "Why did that happen? Could it have been prevented? What’s appropriate and what isn’t in the bonds of marriage? What is in compliance with the teachings of Jesus Christ, and what isn’t?"

One of the major conclusions I've come to in that time is that, despite the tremendous amount of information that can be found in our society today about sex, there is a woeful lack of wholesome, accurate and accessible information, even online. There is more to be found in the wider Christian community that is good and righteous, but their information was often still insufficient for LDS needs.

If pornography is a counterproductive source of information, then where do LDS married couples go to find out about the details of lovemaking without turning to pornography with all of its addictive and destructive attributes? What does LDS doctrine teaches us about love and lovemaking, and how can we keep from being ensnared in the traps that lay in wait for those who have made covenants to the Lord in his holy temples?

I'm currently studying to be a marriage and family coach, and the insights that I'm gaining will be part of what will be explored on this blog. I hope you will find these ideas informative and useful as you attempt to develop intimacy in your marriage while trying to stay on the “strait and narrow” path of the gospel.

Before I go any further, let me make one point perfectly clear. This blog is aimed at LDS members, and specifically those LDS members who are married. Though I attempt to be clinical and not pornographic, some of these posts will be discussing sexual topics in a measure of graphic detail. My thought is, sometimes sexuality just has to be spelled out. Vagueness is crippling when you’re trying to find useful information.

These posts will not be meant for those who are single and trying to keep the Lord's law of chastity. If you currently have no sexual outlet, then reading and discussing sexual topics is inappropriate and actually counter-productive, as I will discuss later. I would ask that those who are single would bypass blogs that are marked with a “For Married Couples Only” warning. I will continue to post warnings of this sort on further blog posts, as well as additional information meant specifically for single LDS members.

Also, if someone who is not a member of the Mormon Church comes across this blog out of curiosity, I welcome you and your thoughts and ideas, as long as they are respectful. Members of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints are part of the wider Christian world, since we do worship Jesus Christ as our Lord and Savior as other Christians do.

However, I cannot direct my posts to Christians in general, since that would necessitate speaking only from the knowledge of the gospel that we gain from the Bible. As an LDS member, I also use the Book of Mormon, which we believe to be another testament of Jesus Christ, as well as the Doctrine and Covenants, the Pearl of Great Price, and the words of modern LDS prophets and apostles. I cannot disregard these precious resources in order to broaden my outreach to the general Christian world.

If you are married, but not LDS, and would like to read these posts, then you are welcome to do so. If you have something to add, I would welcome it. Please respect the sacredness of these topics in your comments. If you don't like the Church's beliefs or doctrines, then on that we must agree to disagree.

I look forward to our journey together.


Lynne said...

looking forward to watching this blog. I was sealed to my husband 13 months ago and this topic seems to be needed within our community for sure!

CoachSam said...

Congratulations Lynne to you and your new eternal companion! Thank you for reading. Now you're married, the rules between boys and girls have changed haven't they?! If you and your husband come across a question about your intimate relationship you need help answering (if you don't find the answer here)let me know and I'll post something directed at providing you both with the information you need.
Our purpose is to provide the sexual information for married couples that was too embarrassing for your Mom and Dad to talk about and too ticklish for your church leaders to discuss. If you're feeling shy, feel free to email me at You can also friend me on facebook and send me a message. I will keep your identity confidential.